Don't Taking Things Personally

Sometimes being emotionally and feeling all of your feelings at once can be extremely overwhelming.

It can also be a huge reason why it’s hard not to just brush off
certain comments, remarks, or even other people’s behavior.

Taking things personally also comes with anxiety.

As someone who suffers firsthand from anxiety, I can tell you that your mind always jumps to the worst-case scenario.

I can tell you when I don’t hear from a friend for a couple of days, I automatically think they are mad at me, or I did something to offend them, or when someone cuts a visit short, you believe you are to
blame.

Instead, I try to look for the positives as much as my mind wants to think the worst.

I tell myself maybe they are tired, or perhaps they have something going on in their personal life.

We don’t know what we don’t know.

Creating these assumptions can really take a toll on us.

Taking things personally can also lead to physical danger.

In domestic violence relationships, it is so easy to say why not just leave. Sometimes we take things personal with ourselves.

You began to place blame on yourself, and you started to self-doubt.

Your self-esteem and your confidence drop as a result.

You think it’s your fault that he yelled or laid his hands on you.

You think maybe you got out of line. You began to believe your abuser, and that’s what we call the trauma bond.

Taking things personally can really escalate and become really serious.

This is why it’s instrumental that you get the help and support you need to draw a line in the sand and not get caught up in taking things so personally.

Try breathing exercises, talk to a counselor with you and feel like you doubt yourself; they may have recommendations for you.

Self-reflect as much as you can, keep a journal.

Now that some things may not have anything to do with you, such as why your friend left early or seemed short with you.

If it really bothers you, express your feelings.

If it’s a true friend, they will accept your feelings, and you can move forward.

True friends are honest with each other.

There are no secrets and lies.

Suppose you’re in an abusive situation, and you find yourself placing blame. In that case, that’s also taking it personally, which is way easier said than done.

They don’t deserve you first, and you don’t deserve to blame yourself.

When you go through trauma and your self-esteem is lowered, of course, you’re going to really take things personally because that’s what you are used to.

This is where you use the tools in your toolbox to help yourself and rebuild your strength so that everything doesn’t have to be taken personally.

That’s a heavy load to carry.

When you take things personally, try to understand it’s not about you and just insecurities of the past.

Try to keep looking forward and take control and express your feelings in a safe way and a safe place.

Build yourself up, not down.