Coping With Aniexty In A Romantic Relationships..
Anxiety alone can be tough to cope with, especially if you're always in your head.
Anxiety is always fearing the worst.
Always wondering when that ball is going to drop and how it’s going to drop.
Anxiety is worry, fear, panic, doom.
It’s feeling like you're not enough, and that you're not good enough.
You over analyze every thought, and every detail.
You don’t live in the here and the now.
Your mind is constantly spinning and swirling with the most overwhelming thoughts.
You feel as though the weight of the world is on your shoulders.
Now imagine feeling all this while being in a relationship, in a romantic one at that.
You're constantly waiting for something to go wrong or your self sabotaging.
We are wired through our past experiences to push away the ones closest to us..
We tend to think that pushing someone away is the easy way out.
We rather run, then follow our true emotions, because it’s easier.
We feel damaged, we often feel as though we don’t deserve love due to past relationships, especially ones that were violent, or toxic.
When we find something normal we don’t know how to react.
Our first instinct is to run before we get too close, and end up hurt, or end up being taken advantage of again.
We think that the romance will have an expiration date on it.
We think how can a person love us?
How can we have something so amazing?
What happens if I get too close?
Will I get burned?
Will this be like every other relationship?
What makes this relationship any different from the others?
He/ she is going to break up, and find someone else!?
What if they get sick of me?
What if they can’t handle me?
What if my past repeats itself?
What if they break up with me?
What if they self sabotage? How do I respond to that?
Self doubt, anxiety, and self sabotage are the biggest threats to destroying a perfectly healthy relationship .
You need to address these factors right away or else your relationship is doomed for failure.
If you continue to think the worst, then the worst will present itself in an ugly way.
It comes down to something as simple as being in the moment, taking it day by day.
You enjoy each others company, and you go with the flow.
Lots of deep breaths.
Before you hit send or any kind of message you send your significant other count to 10 and make sure it’s something you really want to send.
Don’t react in the heat of the moment, think before you speak.
Don’t jump the gun until you have all the facts laid in front of you.
Have ongoing and active communication.
Ask questions before assuming the worst, you want to gain clarity and knowledge first.
Be open, and direct and get to the point, don’t sugar coat.
Talk and take action immediately.
You wouldn’t allow a fire to start in your house, you would want to put it out right away.
Talk as soon as you can.
Talk about solutions.
Talk about the past experiences , and what you want and don’t want in a relationship.
Communication is key to having a healthy solid well balanced relationship.
Always be honest because the truth will catch up sooner than later and will spill over with anxiety.
Get in front of the anxiety, don't allow it to control you, you can control it by how you react and respond and engage in the relationship.
Don’t play games, don't get caught up in the web in your head.
When you have a good thing going with that significant person don’t look for ways to ruin it.
Look for ways to grow it , you know it’s like watering a flower everyday so it doesn’t die.
You have to be willing to water your relationship.
You water it through happiness, love, patience, understanding, honesty, kindness, admiration, compassion, empathy, laughter and from there it grows, it flourishes, it blooms , it blossoms into something so real, and that you cherish with your whole heart.